I may be crazy…

And if I’m not right at this moment, I may be in the relatively near future. Is any mother really sane?

For the record, I’m a bit of a workaholic. I set pretty strong boundaries between work and home, but when I’m at work, I work. I work hard. And I feel strong attachments to the people I work with, and derive great pride in doing my job, doing it well, and finishing what I start.

Me, the workaholic. “Scary Efficient” my husband said.

I’m leaving that world in the coming months. My second child is due in early December, and I’ve made the harrowing decision to stay home with my kids. I’m terribly excited, and terribly scared. If my decision were based solely on temperament, my husband would be the stay-at-home parent. He keeps his cool when I lose mine. He finds natural ways to teach our daughter during play. He doesn’t mind being an observer, or relatively inactive, while I’m a doer. I crave doing.

But my decision isn’t based solely on temperament, and is instead based on so many factors that I choose not to list at this time. And because my decision is not based solely on temperament and I recognize that my temperament is perhaps not ideal to be a SAHM, I’m using this blog as forum to vent, to document this experiment in parental psychology, and to explore strategies for helping me create a fulfilling life as a parent.

I want this for my kids. And I want this for me, even if I don’t quite know what that means yet. (I’m getting choked up just typing this!)

So SAH parents, and especially former workaholics like me, I’m counting on all of you to help me figure this out!

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2 thoughts on “I may be crazy…

  1. Love ya girl! Best wishes in your future job:) From experience, it is not easy emotionally, mentally, or physically. A1 (first born) was an experiment and if I had the chance- I’d get myself a “re-do” button! My advice would be to find a SAHM playgroup to get out and bounce ideas off of other SAHMs. Also get some activities going for your first born. They need “stuff” to do or they go crazy (library story time, park time, etc.). I totally recommend preschool when they’re old enough- totally worth the $. A1 is entering 2nd year of preschool this year and I’ve found homeschool websites helpful for activities to learn from at home during the Summer and to enhance preschool. They have free printables…etc. I am NOT a teacher, nor do I desire to homeschool, but those websites are very helpful. And if you feel like you’re going insane, reach out and grab sanity from friends. I’m always available ๐Ÿ™‚ BTW when A2 came along, it got crazy for awhile, but somehow God helps you figure it out ๐Ÿ™‚ Best wishes ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Thanks Kristina! I’m already keeping tabs on library story times and art days at the gallery in town. L is signed up for preschool in the fall – and she is SOOOO excited. So I’m getting my bearings, but I’m a little lost as to how to find SAHMs. Going to be keeping my eyes peeled, and I will definitely call upon you as a resource. I forgot you were @home!

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